It’s been one of THOSE weeks.

Okay, so I am about to make a Star Wars reference and please do not let this diminish whatever small amount of cool report I have with you.
Cause I am still really cool and Star Wars is really cool, so…

Remember in Star Wars when Luke said I’ll give it a try. Then Yoda says “No. Try not. Do… or do not. There is no try.”

So, I really feel like I have been having one of those weeks where you feel like everything you do, you are just trying your best.
And you end up feeling like you deserve a little leeway from everyone simply because you are trying your best at everything.
It’s not like you are out of control or you can’t function, you are just simply stressed out/upset about something to where you are just going through the motions instead of truly living through the week like you normally do.

It ends up becoming more of a numb experience than actually feeling your stress, I have noticed for me at least.
I don’t ever walk around feeling super stressed out or feeling like I am going to break down all the time. I do sometimes, but not consistently.
Instead I just walk around feeling numb and I have to recognize that I have shut out emotions.
This works just fine during the week where I am at work and I can work out and I am just constantly busy.
Case and point, I worked 53 hours this week.
Is that common?
Not really. I’m trying to avoid things, leave me alone.

But when it’s time for things to calm down, that’s when I end up reaching out to one of my good friends and making her sit in my car while I cry. (I’m attractive.)
But it’s also when I realize that I have gone the whole week without planning what I am going to wear on Sunday. Now I have mentioned before that I love planning my outfits on Sundays and usually take all week to do it.
But not this week. And even when I realized that I was too busy trying to ignore my feelings to actually plan my outfit, I still didn’t plan it.
I have no plans even now.
Probably go naked.
It’s fine.

The point is, I’ve had a difficult week, because I find when I am trying to get by, I spend most of my week working on not thinking about things that I am stressed or upset about instead of just rolling with it.
This is dangerous.
But at least I am trying.

That’s all I really had to say.
It’s 11:40 at night.


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