Just Kidding Everyone!

So, this past weekend I was invited to a Bloggers Meetup.
And I tried to go and failed.

I had a few inhibitions about going, but I was also pretty excited that it
The meetup was in Long Beach and it took me an hour to drive there.
Then when I got there I walked into the restaurant and asked the lady if she knew about the meetup.
She said she did not.
She asked me if I knew who had made the reservation and all I could think about was how the person who invited me’s icon was a dinosaur and the RSVP said her name was Rara.
…I was invited by a dinosaur.
I felt uncomfortable.
And I don’t normally feel uncomfortable, but it almost felt like I was exposing a part of myself that really shouldn’t be out there.
I don’t normally, openly announce I blog.

And then the worst, the hostess said:

Why don’t you walk around and see if people are talking about blogging?

But the way she said it, she was laughing at me.
I felt like the dorkiest person alive.
And why would they be talking about blogging? I’m sure they would be having a normal conversation.
Come on now.

So, I sat outside and debated leaving on the phone with my sister for 15 minutes and then I left.
Feeling like a dork.
And I drove all the way home telling myself “Well, I was just joking about going anyways.”
Which I wasn’t seeing as I drove there, but it didn’t work out.
So what do you do?

You know, I had never thought of blogging as dorky until that moment. In fact, I don’t really think about blogging at all that much.
It’s just something I do.
I don’t put much thought into it outside of what I want to talk about that day.

Ever since I have started blogging, I have been really good about talking about my life, but at the same time keeping my life out of my blogging.
I don’t have anyone that I know in real life reading my blog, I never really directly talk about people in my blog.
I just try to keep it separate.
And after this experience of trying to integrate the two, I just wonder if that is the best practice.
To have my blog be personal, but not merged with myself.
I mean, this is where I put some of my inner most thoughts and I don’t know if it would work for my inner most thoughts to meet my outer most self.
Those two don’t mix.

You can’t see me shrug.


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