“Weird” is not an Academic Term and Other Essay Mistakes I Continue to Make.

I dislike writing essays. I really do. They come to me easy, I know certain people who will spend 4 hours writing an essay, but I have never really experienced that. The only thing that takes so long for me when I am writing an essay is the multiple breaks I take. I have no dedication.

I am a college student. I go to college. It is one of the more expensive and lavish things that I do on a regular basis. I like to treat myself.

Anyways, one of the biggest differences I can see between college and the basic schools are the fact that you write so many more essays than you did in high school or middle school. The basic schools were more based on tests to show your academic achievement, whereas college (or at least my college) they use essays to see if you really understood the lessons.

I rather dislike essays. This post could be seen as a rant as to why I dislike essays so much. There are so many rules to essays that it gets to the point where I feel like we are just being ridiculous. And the worst part is that fact that you’re not graded as much about what you wrote, you are graded on how well you followed those set rules.

Take my last essay as an example. I got marked down for using the word “weird”. My professor wrote a note about how “weird” is not an academic term, therefore I shouldn’t use it in academic settings. I also got marked down for using a contraction. The word “wasn’t” should not be used in academic settings.
I have a problem with this. You see, when I write, I write how I talk most of the time because I am talking when I write things. Like all of these blog posts, I say the words as I type them. I sit and talk to my computer screen. That is how these words happen. Obviously I clean them up a bit, I don’t cuss in these posts, and there are a couple of things that cannot be expressed through text, like when I make a noise to enhance what I am saying.
When I am talking, you can imagine I don’t say things like “You are acting really peculiar right now and I just want to hit you.” or “That was not a correct action for you to take.” I would sound like a pompous prick.

Well in essays, they like that. They love Pricks.

The second thing that makes me want to kill myself when I am writing essays is the references. Writing an essay is almost like doing a puzzle. I have to take so many pieces of what other people said and try to fit it together to make it say what I want.
Why Oh Why must I reference everything? In my last class I wrote an essay and the professor sent it back with a bunch of sentences highlighted saying “These need to be referenced.”
Not really, that was me talking. I wasn’t quoting anyone there. I can’t just say something, I have to hope that someone said it before me? AND THEN! Oh Baby, we are going to check and make sure you aren’t plagiarizing.  Isn’t that what you guys want? You want me to fill up 750 words with quotes from people who academically speaking know more than me.

Then comes the part where you actually have to make your reference page. If you are in classes 300 to 400 please use MLA Reference Style. If you are in classes 400 to 600 use APA 5th Edition Style. If you are in classes 700 to 900 use APA 6th Edition Style. Don’t forget to throw in the italicize in the correct places.

Why do we have styles? Why are you making new Editions for Referencing? Are you that bored? Why can’t we just say This person said this on this date? It’s super simple and you guys are making it way more complicated than it needs to be. I feel like you do that just to knock points off of my essays because I’m not seeing a difference in any of these “styles”. They all look the same to me.

Oh College, Why do you do this to me? I don’t feel smarter. (Corrie Kartchner wrote this post on September 20th, 2012 at 7:50 am on I’ve Never Robbed A Bank. – That is how should be reference is done)


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