On the Subject of Starbucks

“The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee.
Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat..etc cetera.
So, people who don’t know what the hell they’re doing  or who on earth they are can, for only $3.95 get not just a cup of coffee BUT an absolutely defining sense of self.
TALL DECAF CAPPUCCINO!”  – Tom Hanks

Starbucks took over. Everyone knows it. At least in America and Mexico, I can’t say anything about anywhere else because I haven’t been in any other countries in the past 2 years. There is one on every corner.

Anyways, I heard the other day that Starbucks is going to get rid of all of it’s choices for coffee. They think that it is too complicated. They are going to go back to basic choices.
Tall, Medium, Short. Dark or whatever the other choices are. But simple.
Apparently they realized their choices are too complicated for people like construction workers. Apparently they want to appeal to the Average Joe.

The only problem with this plan is, I’m pretty sure Construction workers don’t buy Starbucks coffee for $5 a cup. They go to the gas station and get their coffee for $1.50. The people who go to Starbucks are 16-year-old girls. Plus they have already branded themselves as a crazy flavour machine.

Anyways, I don’t really drink coffee. I wish I did cause I like the taste. I wish I drank it, but I don’t. I’m afraid of substance addictions.

 

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2 thoughts on “On the Subject of Starbucks

  1. Starbucks is popular here in the UK too. It’s overpriced and overrated. But to be fair, the main reasons I don’t go there that much is because there is a lot of choice, and choice scares me, but also because I feel mildly intimidated by half their customers. I’m not clever or indie enough to drink there. Way too far out of my confort zone, and my wallet. Lol

    1. Well yeah, there are so many choices that you almost need a chaperon to go in there the first time. I really think taking away the choices won’t bring in new customers though, just annoy the older ones.
      And paying 3 pounds for a cup of coffee is about the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard of. We could go to the store and buy all the ingredients for about that much. Goodness.

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