Vitamin Water, Anyone?

Vitamin Water is pretty popular of a drink. I used to be a fan, but then one day I looked down at what I was drinking and though, “Uh what is this? This doesn’t taste like the fruits it proclaims to taste like. It tastes weird.” So that’s when I became a NOTfan. You see how that works?

I find it so interesting how sometimes we are really big fans of something and then out of nowhere we decide that we don’t like it anymore. Just like that. One day we are totally turned on by the idea of something and the next day we are repulsed by it. But that’s off topic.

So Vitamin Water has come out with a new flavour called Stur-D. And by new I mean it probably came out months ago but I’m so out of the loop I didn’t find out until today. This new flavour is a light blue purplish concoction with a label that looks like a metallic silver. Metallic silver is about the last thing I want on a drink, makes me think of laboratories, which reminds me of where this drink probably came from.
My sister came home with this new Vitamin Water and said that I had to try it. She is unaware of my conversion to not liking Vitamin Water. When I tried it, it tasted like someone in the laboratory had spilled something in the blueberry extract and was afraid to get in trouble by telling someone, so it went forth to be sold. In short, it was a weird freaking flavour. Well I looked up what the actual flavour was because I didn’t have time to study the label to discover the actual contents of the bottle. The new flavour proclaims to be “a blend of blue agave, passion fruit and citrus flavors.”
I don’t even know what some of those flavours are, let alone if they should be mixed together. Not only that, but is it just me or do they seem to be coming out with new fruit flavours all the time? Just like how they just barely “discovered” acai berries a few years ago. And when I say discovered, I mean the general public found out about it. Now we have passion fruits and blue agave? What the hell is an agave? All I know is it has become popular enough to become a Vitamin Water and have its own Yogurtland flavour. And besides that, I have always found that citrus can be such a strong flavoured thing, that you are really taking a chance by mixing it with any other flavour.
Now not only does this new drink have some pretty suspicious flavours, but it also says that no matter what you are doing, it can provide you with the exact amount of vitamins you need for that activity. I’m not saying that it doesn’t, I’m just saying that’s a lot of responsibility to take on in a 20 oz bottle.

Now I only bring this up because after taking a swig of this new beverage, I noticed something besides the weird flavouring. My tongue was numb. I took one drink and my tongue went numb. You might think it could have been what I was eating before hand, but I hadn’t eaten anything for at least an hour before taking a drink of it. And no, I don’t chew on my tongue or anything like that.
What the heck? It’s been almost 30 minutes and it’s still pretty numb. I took a look at my tongue in the mirror and I have the hinting of a bit of blue on my tongue. One drink and it’s colouring my tongue? Now this very well may be an allergic reaction. I could be allergic to “agave”. I’m not allergic to passion fruit. How do I know? Cause I’ll show you passion fruit! That was a pun.
Anyways, allergic or not. I just thought it was pretty suspicious that I took one drink of it and my tongue is now numb. That’s not natural.

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2 thoughts on “Vitamin Water, Anyone?

  1. I’ve never been much of a bottled water fan…with or without flavor. It always seemed like such a scam to me. But then again I grew up in the country where a garden hose was an applicable source of drinking water as a kid.

    1. Yeah, same here. Especially when it’s really carbonated water.
      And the garden hose is a very trust worthy source. I used to love drinking from the hose, made me feel cool and the interesting water flow felt good in my mouth.

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